First, an initial contact and a brief, free consultation occurs.

Second, if after consultation, mediation is desired then an agreement to mediate is made with all those involved.

Third, there is pre-mediation preparation.  Before the parties come together the mediator meets one on one with the multiple, interested parties to hear them out and to discover and analyze the issues. If the dispute involves multiple parties and multiple issues the discovery process will take longer.

Fourth, the mediator brings the parties together in a mediation conference to discuss the issues and work together on resolution.  The mediation conference between 2-3 individuals usually takes 2-4 hours. In organizational, multi-issue disputes the mediation conference may take a day or two. Mediation is not designed to be an on-going process.  The objective is to arrive at a formalized, written resolution agreement with one or more components with which those involved can live with.  No one will be asked to accept any resolution they can't live with.

Fifth, the mediation process may involve a future follow-up meeting to be sure that follow-through is occurring and to resolve any new issues that may have arisen.

The mediation process differs significantly from what often occurs in organizations and churches. When conflict has reached the level of leaders, they rightly attempt to resolve the dispute.  When resolution on this level fails, outside intervention is often sought.  A person in  authority from outside the church or organization is brought in.  This outside authority is usually not a neutral third party.  They too seek to assess the issue(s).  But the suggestions made to the leadership board for resolution have an underlying bias or conflict of interest involved.  In essence, the outside authority functions as an arbitrator.  In the opinion of this dispute resolution specialist the "arbitration" process may result in settling the conflict but often does not result in resolution.  The "arbitration" process results in an imposed settlement.  It is not voluntary and the result is often not resolution. 

This sort of informal "arbitration" process has its place but should not precede mediation.  It should be an option sought only after mediation has been attempted.  If this "cart before the horse" approach is used, most often there is a "win-lose" result and someone(s) walk away with a sour taste in their heart.  Further, this approach usually has negative consequences and is destructive to people and the organizations they are in.  Leaders become dispirited and organizations lose their sense of "community" and spree decor.

Please, for the kingdom's sake or the sake of your organization's health, give mediation a chance.